We Don’t Remember Days, But Moments

Memory is not just an intellectual function. The memories of a person are not like those of a computer: they do not store data, but events. This means that we remember images, words, but also colors, flavors, sensations.

It can be said that memory, in the human being, is a purely affective function. The information and events that are remembered almost never correspond to objective data. Human memory is creative and therefore eliminates or adds elements to memories, depending on the affects involved.

In fact, there are occasions when events that never occurred are remembered. This happens mainly with the events of childhood. Fantasies are experienced with such intensity that they enter one’s memory, without actually occurring.

The events that are remembered

In fact, memory is capable of storing absolutely everything we feel during our existence. However, only a few events are remembered; the others remain submerged by the unconscious.

There is a part of our memory where memories of when we first opened our eyes remain etched. Nonetheless, none of us can remember it, and this is mainly due to two reasons.

The first, according to a study conducted in Canada, concerns the fact that  the memories of the first years of life are erased, as a consequence of the constant production of new neurons.  

The second is that we do not remember those first moments, because, during this phase, the deepest experiences of our psyche are produced which end up being repressed, as they are intolerable for our conscience. This is what happens with the Oedipus Complex.

However,  many of those memories persist and appear in consciousness as an isolated and, at the same time, very deep sensation. For example, when we listen to a melody and an emotion is activated that takes us back to the past, to which, however, we cannot assign a specific date or situation.

In general terms, we could say that what one remembers consciously is what required great attention or concentration and which had a content that was understandable  to us; we are talking about those positive or negative situations, but relatively reasonable and with a confused or contradictory emotional content.

Let’s remember the uncommon things better

These situations that completely capture our attention involve the involvement of a whole series of components. Mental concentration, the feeling of alertness, an associated strong feeling and some elements of surprise or novelty related to the three antecedent components. For this reason, it is relatively easy to remember uncommon events and, conversely, to easily forget routine ones.   

We consciously remember moments that, in one way or another, demand full attention from us and that have an affective impact on us. However, these moments must be completely understandable for them to remain etched in consciousness, otherwise they will be repressed. 

Unforgettable moments

What we do not forget is what forces us to live the present intensely in a given situation.  Those moments in which we feel at one with the universe, in which there is nothing but what surrounds us and it seems to us that the world begins and ends exactly where we are. This is as true for pleasant experiences as it is for horrifying ones.

These are the moments when you feel the pulse of life under the skin. It doesn’t matter if it’s day or night, cold or hot. The only thing that matters is that you feel you are the protagonists of a fleeting and, at the same time, eternal story.

Those moments become infinite, and even years later they can arouse singular emotions. It is as if we were living that moment again, as there are so much intense reminiscences that it is almost possible.

Depending on the experiences before or after that moment, the evocation will be more or less exact. If after a negative event there were pleasant moments, he will certainly remember with less drama, perhaps even with a smile. If, on the other hand, difficult situations arose after them, the value will be profoundly negative.

If what you experienced was positive but followed by negative events, you will remember it with nostalgia. If after as many pleasant moments occurred, the emotion of the memory can be intense and gratifying.

So is memory: creative and flexible. Like a sponge that absorbs all the unique and unrepeatable moments that have made the difference in our life.  Like a large album full of photographs, which is reviewed when the heart needs it and which allows us to understand that we do not remember the days, but the moments.