The Embittered Sow In Others The Sadness That Afflicts Him

Bitterness is often a form of hidden depression in which the person focuses almost exclusively on the outside world. The world of the embittered is full of windows through which he sees only injustice, from which he likes to look out to overturn his rancor, his bitter melody and his pessimistic feelings. The embittered wants imprisonment, but at the same time asks for help.

Certainly, at this moment, many of us will think of a person close to us who, at some moment, gives us the feeling of feeling a sadistic pleasure in loving our life with his reasoning, advice and behavior. Despite this, his reality of the facts is usually very far from this alleged pleasure – increased by the frequency with which he repeats it -. What is certain is that it is nothing more than an unhappy person.

The embittered feels, first of all, that he has lost control of his life. We are facing a state of such defeat that the person simply stops being responsible for himself. He assumes the role of the victim and lets himself be carried away. It is therefore necessary to know how to understand and make strategies to help him, because beyond how much these attitudes can bother us, it is good to understand that we are faced with someone who needs to be helped.

The embittered and the roots of bitterness

Nobody comes into the world with bitterness in their hearts. However, sometimes childhood becomes the perfect scenario to find out how it develops and what this sensation tastes like. A communication or an education without affection can dig a hole already at an early age, so that the heart plants those roots that will bear as fruit the shadows that dwell in the soul of the embittered.

Bitterness is a seed that is sown and that does not sprout immediately. His presence, at first, is silent. One disappointment hurts, but it doesn’t change us, two make us think, but when you accumulate too many stones along the way and end up attributing a negative value to your existence, you stop having control over your life. The seeds then sprout… and make us sick.

A fact that we must also take into consideration is that relating to the classic image of the embittered elderly person. We have all known that old man who reacts with apathy, who anticipates negative things and who seems to feel a lot of grudge towards the world and his own life . As the journal Health Psychology explains, these are all, in most cases, indicators of latent depression. It is important to take this into account.

Bitterness and emotional numbness

Bitterness is often described as the classic “toxic” behavior. We are used to using the label “toxicity” very lightly, as if we feel the need to wear a mask and quickly move away from some individuals without taking into account their personal reality; their emotional prison. This is not correct . At least not as far as bitterness is concerned.

As we have already mentioned above, the embittered person is not born such, it becomes so over time due to different situations that have not been adequately managed and that at a given moment overwhelmed them. It should not be abandoned, let alone left adrift in this emotional numbness. We know that a bitter brain – depressed – cannot turn into a happy brain overnight, but it never hurts to know some basic advice.

How to change the attitude of an embittered person

Just as we pointed out at length in the article, bitterness is sometimes an indicator of depression. For this, it is important to push the accusing person to consult a health professional who can assess their condition. It is a necessary and essential first step. Later, we can put the following into practice.

• Use compassion and optimism . We know that the embittered wants to trap us with his cynicism, with his rancor and fatalism. Despite this, far from falling into the trap, it is important not to change our attitude in anything and to be able to respond to its negativity with optimism.

• Don’t internalize his attacks, be patient . It is not the person’s heart that speaks, but the root of his bitterness and his ill-managed disappointments, his unsolved traumas, his unfilled voids. Keep calm and always respond with the voice of closeness, of kindness.

• The nvitate the bitter to adopt new habits. Bitterness is passive, corrosive and feeds on the person’s thoughts. One way to “break” this cycle of negativity is to encourage the person to change habits, to engage in new activities, to move on to other scenarios. Therefore, without putting pressure on them, suggest that they go out for a walk, do sports, sign up for some courses, get to know other people …

The person who is not pleased with his heart, with his past and with his thoughts, will be at war with everyone around him. Get them to find that balance, the key to healing their wounds and appeasing their internal battles. It is necessary to give him our help, but taking care of our limits and without neglecting our self-esteem.